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Without going into too much detail (in respect of the persons involved) I have to say that yesterday was one of the worst days in my ‘professional’ career.

It started off a little…off…from the moment my alarm went off at 5 AM.

First sign of oddity.

See, Wednesdays are my mid-range run day.  This particular week, I was slated to run 8 miles.  But as aforementioned…the alarm went off at 5 AM.  I looked at it and just felt this incredible heavy feeling.  No energy.  I squinted at the alarm application on the iPhone and thought, “okay, let me switch it back to 5:30 AM, then I can swap my 4-miler.”  It felt like I had just closed my eyes when the alarm blared again.  5:30 AM, already.

This might sound normal for others, but I am a morning person.  This is NOT normal for me.  I grabbed the iPhone and reset for 6:30 AM.

At the time, I figured that my 8 PM to 10 PM courses were just taking their toll on me, and reminded myself that as important as marathon training is, sleep is just as vital to the plan as miles are.  I still felt weird, but by the time I made it to work and made a cup of coffee, I shook it off.

<3

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Lunchtime arrived and I performed my usual routine of setting the daytime mode on the phone, locking up important documents and securing my computer.  I went down to the cafeteria where hubs and I meet and I had my quinoa salad that I had prepared earlier in the week.  We watched the news on CNN, as always.  I watched hubs chow down on his lunchtime staple: Turkey Pastrami and Swiss on Great Harvest Dakota bread, made daily by his lovely wife. We finished up our meal.  We drove to Starbucks.  I had a latte – wanted a cookie, too, but resisted.  Same old.

Returned to the office…cue schedule malfunction.

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Within three seconds of stepping into the office suite, I knew something was horribly wrong.  Some of the brightest-eyed and pleasant people I knew in the office had their heads drawn down, their eyes slightly rising as I walked in.  The same heaviness that had pulled me down that morning, sacrificing my precious morning run had returned.  The words came out.

“They let me go.”

My trainer. My mentor. My colleague. My friend.

The next few moments were isolated – like underwater suspension.  I felt so many emotions all at once…shock, disbelief, anger, sadness, betrayal.  How could SHE be going?  Why? How could this be happening?

But she, as the always eloquent and kind person that she is, showed only resilience, “this door is closing, but I have faith another will open.”

HOW.  How could she be so…positive?  No, maybe that wasn’t the right term…resigned?  Accepting of her fate?

We shared a few moments and hugs were exchanged.  She was already headed out the door, she wanted to tell me in person before security escorted her out.  I felt a lull.  A deafening silence.  A driving dark emptiness.

The rest of the afternoon was a haze.  I stared out the door. I cried.  The chemicals from my mascara burned around my eyes as I tried to take deep breaths and flush out the bad feelings.  At the encouragement of a colleague, I took a walk.

I felt the wave again.

Why. Why. Why. This made no sense.  Guilt, anger, confusion.

I spent the rest of the afternoon talking with colleagues – all offering their words of experience.  Moments with them helped, but I still couldn’t push the sadness away.

Work ended. Had dinner, did some baking, attended my online class, read Mockingjay til my eyes shut.  Woke up…

4:47 AM - 8 miles. Felt hard.  Felt alive.

It is a new day.

It doesn’t feel any easier, it’s still not fair, but isn’t that what life is?

We have to keep living.

Top is taking shape!!

So far, I have :

1. Deconstructed a purple North Face tech tank
2. Hand sewed panels of it onto a pink Adidas tank.
3. Cut off the bottom of seamless navy tank (that I bought this weekend for $4) and sewed it over the pink tank.
4. Purchased a red table runner from the Dollar Tree – will trim this and likely add velcro to secure it on, since it’s not a tech fabric; but I think it adds a certain rich ‘costume’ quality.

Costume inspiration!

Next steps…

1. Find red running skirt (almost was lucky yesterday! Found a Fila red running skirt @ Marshall’s – but they only had XS and L left!  I tried on both and neither would have worked).
2. Decide on socks/sleeves – I think these would be awesome with the costume!
3. Accessories – find similar (lightweight!) necklace
4. Get a ‘matchy’ sports bra for the light blue top element – maybe this one.
5. Hair – trying to decide if I should do the bun or just an accessory over the standard ponytail.

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Anything else I am missing?  Would love to hear your thoughts, suggestions or recommendations!

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ETA: Some skirt options…

1. Athleta Swagger Skort (in Hibiscus)
2. Skirt Sports Marathon Girl (in Red Kiss)
3. Lululemon Run Speed Skirt (Tango) – no longer made, only finding $$ ones on eBay like this >> NWT Lululemon Run SPEED Skirt Tango Red Coal Trim

Fundraising

Thanks to all of you!

As previously reported, I am extremely grateful that I’ve been able to make my Fundraising Goal - with time to spare!  In fact, just this week we were tasked to turn in re-commitment paperwork for the team that dealt with the somewhat touchy details of what will happen if you cannot reach your goal.  I am thankful that I’m in a great place, as far as fundraising is concerned.  I am hopeful that I can reach an even $2k by the time we reach the deadline of March 5, especially since I still have 23 states to go for the State Challenge.

Speaking of…

Map last updated today, 1/20/12

BIG thank you to Robin for repping Massachusetts today!  It really warms my heart to get support, especially from phenomenal running role models as herself!

Training

I’ve said it before and will likely say it again and again, but I am a big fan of this training cycle!  I have been really enjoying the varied routine (oxymoron?) of mid-length runs midweek, some speedwork on shorter distance days and the wonderful long run Saturdays.  Last weekend, we hit 15 miles and to be honest, I could’ve run for another 5-10, it was so enjoyable!

This training has really taught me that I am a weird cat/dog hybrid when it comes to my runner classification (see what I am talking about here).  See, I equally love running WITH people (long runs) as much as I love running ALONE (zone out midweek runs).  Running really is a versatile activity and this training cycle has made me appreciate that even more.

Metrics!

(source >> let’s be friends!)

Mileage is gradually cranking up, as we started the training in November (right before I ran Richmond) and will move through March.  With a week and a half to go in January, I’ll be hitting my first 100-mile month since July and I am weirdly excited about that!

January Thoughts

Green Sparkle!

With just under two months to go now, I am as stoked as ever to be a part of Team in Training and to run the Shamrock Marathon!  I ordered my Team Sparkle green skirt as soon as it came in stock and can’t wait to debut it at Virginia Beach!

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There’s still time to donate to my fundraising efforts, just click on over to My Fundraising Page today!

(especially if you’re from AL, AK, CT, DE, ID, IL, KS, KY, MN, MS, MO, MT, NE, NH, NM, ND, OH, OR, RI, SD, TN, UT or WY!)

Some things never change…I still want a pink car!  Here are some more fun images…

How fun would it be to own a pink car?  And don’t forget this bumper sticker:

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What’s YOUR dream car / color?

Roadtrip! Er, or NOT!

Not like I am counting, but in 34 days, I will be 800 miles South of Charlottesville, VA – immersed in a land of Fantasy, basking in the warmth of the Sunshine State once again.  For three wondrous days, I’ll be living the life…with a waterfront address and not a care in the world…

Yup, I’ll be in THE ZONE – the Disney Dork Zone.

..in 3D!

Haha, yes, I am fully aware of how ridiculous I look in this very old photo.  Can you believe that this was taken the first time I took hubs to the Disney parks?  We had been dating for one month, and I made him wear the ‘First Visit’ button and everything.  See, there’s proof here:

Meeting Belle...

Anywho!  Enough of that…it’s time to talk about PLANS!

...FUN is obviously a priority

…okay, this is really rough, but this is the idea: our arrival and departure times, the race and everything else is peachy (hence, the pink shade).  I am trying to decide if I want to make dining reservations (so weird to be on this end of the equation now, btw) and can I just say I am TOTALLY stoked to stay at an Epcot area resort for the very first time?  I know, I worked at the International Gateway forEVER but never ever stayed at the resorts that the guests I served were staying at.

Disney's Boardwalk! and look, it's me jumping over here ^^

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As I approach the planning of this trip, I return to the advice that I used to dispense when speaking to guests over the phones at the Disney Reservation Center (ahh, the beloved CM days) which boiled down to this simple suggestion:

“Create a Vacation Top 5 - this way, everyone gets a say in the planning.“

See, most people don’t realize that Walt Disney World is much more than an ‘amusement park’ – it is, legitimately, a whole WORLD of attractions, entertainment venues, restaurants and so much more.  To try and do it all is WAY TOO STRESSFUL – and aren’t you on a vacation to alleviate stress?  The Top 5 approach is a realistic (and fun) way to see what you want to see – and anything else…well that’s just an awesome bonus!

Here’s my Princess Weekend Top 5 so far…will need to confer with my other girls’ weekend half to complete this!!

1. Run Princess Half Marathon
2. Go to Babycakes NYC (I really liked my cupcake there last Half Marathon weekend!)
3. See my BFF
4. ?
5. ?

Are you a trip planner?  Or more of a spontaneous sort?

I like to say that I am spontaneous, but I am sure this post proves otherwise…

There is NO way you cannot get pumped from this song!  I recently added this track to my rotation for both my ‘slow’ and ‘fast’ playlists – because let’s face it, even during a long run it feels great to hear a power song!

You better believe that this song is making both my Princess and Shamrock lists, too!

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What’s your power song?

As fate (and twitter!) would have it, however, things were about to shift into an exciting direction.  My good friend April and I were chatting on twitter, as per usual, and the subject of a warm weather getaway came up.  A few ideas were casually thrown around and amidst this conversation, it dawned on me: this could be an excellent WDW opportunity since April’s hubs isn’t the biggest Disney fan.  The wheels were turning…

Simple math.

See, Florida was definitely a location we tossed around – and as much as I would love to visit places in the state that I have not yet been to, I KNOW there is a place in Florida that is always a welcoming place…and since hubs and I are DVC members, accommodations are essentially “taken care of,” the only other big expense would be flights…and after scoping out some airline deals, I found $200 range R/T flights…oh, and look at that, huh, a race going on in February, too?  Coincidence? Hrmm…

Sealed the deal!

…so yes, it is OFFICIALLY OFFICIAL!  February 25 to 27, I’ll be headed down South to the land of Mickey for a self-made three-day weekend at the Boardwalk Villas for girlfriend time, park-hopping, hopefully a jaunt over to the Lululemon outlet and, oh, a lil ol’ 13.1 race.  No big deal.

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Are you running Princess?